My December
by Tenshi Anrui
Summary: Tomoyo's feelings for Sakura seem to become stronger on the day of Sakura's wedding with Syaoran, now what will she do about it? Pls Read and Review, Arigatou!!


My December = lyrics  
  
This is my December This is my time of the year This is my December This is all so clear  
  
Tomoyo watched as the snow fell silently yet so peacefully. She wanted to be the snow so badly right now, to not have to feel the pain that was growing in her chest and the tightness in her lungs.  
  
'Oh God. I can't do this. She knows I can't. Why the hell is she putting me through this?'  
  
There was a light knock on the door and Tomoyo turned toward the fire before calling for whoever it was to come in. A maid walked in and looked at Tomoyo in a bit of a concerned way. "Mademoiselle Tomoyo, you said for us to tell you when the noon hour came. Mademoiselle, excuse me if I'm intruding but. would you like us to cancel your. arrangement?"  
  
Tomoyo looked great fully at the maid and smiled sadly "No, Renee, if she wants to get married, it's not my issue to be. dishonorable. after all these years. No, I will be there as expected. Shall we begin on my hair? The soon to be Madame Sakura likes it when it's down and my hair just won't listen to me today."  
  
Tomoyo quickly changed the subject. Sakura's wedding was something her heart wouldn't allow her to focus on too much.  
  
This is my December This is my snow covered home This is my December This is me alone  
  
Sakura stood in the fitting room, white dress and all. "This is it. You're going to be the new Mrs. Sakura Li. Wow, and to think it was only so little time ago that we hated one another." Sakura sighed and gave a wry smile to her reflection. The reflection smiled back and she looked over her dress. "This is me. Amazing, to think that I used to be so. hmmm." Sakura's voice trailed as she swirled in front of the mirror.  
  
There was knock on the door and a tall brunette man with grave yet joyful brown eyes walked in. He was about thirty and still looked as handsome as he had in high-school. "So, I guess this means you're not a monster anymore." He gave her a lopsided smile as he walked over to her and pulled a piece of thread off her gown.  
  
She gave him a grin and hugged him. "It also means that he's part of the family now. It doesn't matter if you do hate him, we're in love."  
  
Touya gave her a long look. "I don't hate him. You do realize that he used to be in love with Yuki, don't you?"  
  
Sakura sighed and nodded. He continued "That was half the reason I hated him. The other. well, I guess it's too late for the other reason to be put into action."  
  
"Touya!" she swatted him playfully. Her jitters were worse than Touya's humor.  
  
This is my December This is my snow covered home This is my December This is me alone  
  
Tomoyo was beautiful. Save the tears in her eyes, she looked like she should be a queen. Laid down on her bed, she watched as the snow fell outside her windows.  
  
There was a knock on the door and Sakura walked in.  
  
"Tomoyo-chan?" she called.  
  
Tomoyo sat upright and pushed back the curtain of her bed. "Sakura? What are you doing here?" She watched as her close friend looked up at the window made ceiling and sighed.  
  
"It's beautiful."  
  
Tomoyo smiled and looked at her longingly. "Yes, it is. Sakura, why are you here? Certainly not to just watch the snow with me?"  
  
Sakura pouted and gave her a hurt look. "Right. You're all dressed up but you weren't at the before party. I was wondering why you didn't call or say you couldn't make it. I got worried so I came because all your maids said you were unavailable. Tomoyo-chan. is something wrong or on your mind?"  
  
Tomoyo looked at her gravely. 'No. She's about to get married! Don't be a moron, you'll ruin both of your lives if you say something!'  
  
"No, I just really didn't want to see you get married." Tomoyo's eyes grew wide as did Sakura's and she covered her mouth wishing it had not come out that way. "Sakura-"  
  
Sakura nodded, tears in her eyes. "Don't worry, I get it. No problem. I'll just leave now. Well. goodbye." Sakura ran out of the room.  
  
"No! Sakura, wait, you don't understand!" there was a slam of the door and suddenly Tomoyo really felt as if she were the snow.  
  
Cold and always being left behind.  
  
And I Just wish that I didn't feel Like there was Something I missed And I Take back all The things I said To make you Feel like that  
  
Sakura ran out of the house, eyes streaming with tears.  
  
'What did I do? We've known each other for so long and suddenly she doesn't even want to be to what is suppose to be the happiest day of my life!?'  
  
Sakura sat in her car and drove a few blocks before stopping and letting all her tears drain down her face. She felt the make-up from the before party smear and watched as it fell onto her new white shirt. She took a deep breath. "Dammit, now I have to get that clean. Smart one Sakura." She reached for the napkins that were in her glove compartment and dabbed her shirt and face.  
  
"Maybe I need to Syaoran. He'll know what to do." She blew her nose and sped off to her fiancée's apartment. Upon arrival, she was greeted with a warm hug and cried into his shoulder.  
  
"What's wrong, my little cherry blossom?" he asked softly as they snuggled close together on the couch.  
  
"It's Tomoyo." she told the whole story and by the time she was done Syaoran had stopped snuggling and instead was looking gravely. He nodded and then stood up with his car keys.  
  
"Where are you going?" she asked him.  
  
"I need to speak with someone who. who wishes to speak with someone else." And with that he left.  
  
And I Just wish that I didn't feel Like there was Something I missed And I Take back all the Things I said to you  
  
Tomoyo dialed the number and t didn't matter how many times she dialed, Sakura never answered.  
  
A little voice in her head whispered the insane. 'She needs to know. You have to tell her before she's unreachable for good. You have to tell her. She'll understand this time you tell her and she'll.'  
  
The thought was left uncompleted. What would Sakura do? After so long of thinking only what bad things might happen if she knew, she had no idea what would happen if her reaction had been good. If Sakura too loved her, she had no idea what she would do.  
  
She was picking up the phone when a door was slammed and Syaoran burst into the room.  
  
"You. she's mine! Please, I love her!" he began to cry onto her shoulder.  
  
Her words were not comforting as they usually were. "As do I."  
  
And I give it all away Just to have somewhere To go to Give it all away To have someone To come home to  
  
Syaoran's tears were unstoppable. He went into hysterics. He had always known of Tomoyo's attraction to Sakura, but he had always thought that he had the upper hand, unaware of his deep fear of losing his love.  
  
He gasped for breath as he wept openly as he had done many other times to Tomoyo. "I love her! She's the only one I've ever truly loved! Please, Tomoyo, don't take her away form me. I can't think of what I would do without her. She's. she's the only one. the only one I've ever had dreams about that didn't involve power related subjects. Tomoyo." as his voice faded his nostalgia grew to be more and more explicit. He could feel Tomoyo's muscles tighten with his every word and knew she was suffering from the inside too.  
  
"You know." she spoke softly and slowly "I did tell her once. She didn't understand. We were so young and naïve that I didn't think she would even notice. And, as many hints as I gave her, she never did. She fell in love with you and didn't even think about it as I gave her stronger hints. It was like some unnoticeable cage had been placed around me s that only she could not see me. I tried so hard to break that cage. and even today, she still hasn't noticed that I. I. I love her." Tomoyo spoke her last words bitterly and with much resent in her shrill whisper.  
  
Syaoran glared at her through tears. "You never told her. If you really loved her, you would've told her."  
  
She gave him a sad smile and a single tear ran down her cheek. "On the contrary, I did tell her. I told her an endless amount of time and never once did she realize what my messages meant."  
  
More tears followed the first as the memories of the numerous times came to mind.  
  
This is my December These are my snow covered dreams This is me pretending This is all I need  
  
Sakura sat on the couch, her tears falling and her shirt already soaked. She had no idea what to do now. Tomoyo, her maid of honor, was mad at her and her soon-to-be husband had run off to God knows where.  
  
She lay down on her back and closed her eyes, trying to get herself to calm down.  
  
'You know what she's going to do. Just think about it.' Sakura decided against what her little voice was telling her. She really didn't want to have to think about anything right then except getting married to Shyaoran. That's all she wanted, it was rather simple.  
  
"And do you take him, Syaoran Li, to be your fully wedded husband? To hold and to cherish, to love and to care for till death do you part?" the words seemed to be planted into her mind ever since he had popped the question and they seemed to suit her mind so well.  
  
But there was always a bit of a twitch in those words that she could never figure out. Something small that seemed to fall out of place and never should've been there in the first place. She closed her eyes, finally calming down.  
  
'If there is anyone here who should think these two not fit to be together, then speak now or forever hold your peace.' In Sakura's mind's eye there was a figure standing up in the crowd. Her hair was down, her gray eyes filled, and she was the most beautiful thing in nature that Sakura had ever seen.  
  
"Tomoyo-chan." Sakura muttered in her deep sleep before sitting up right in a cold sweat.  
  
And I Just wish that I didn't feel Like there was Something I missed And I Take back all The things I said To make you feel like that  
  
Sakura picked up the phone and dialed Syaoran's cell number.  
  
'One ring. two rings. three. four. five. six. seven.' Sakura counted all the way to twenty before finally hanging up.  
  
"Where the hell is my fiancée? We need to be at the reception in an hour!" Sakura yelled to absolutely no one in particular. She angrily kicked the table next to the couch and a picture fell off of it and shattered. Sakura froze.  
  
'There's no such thing as omen's.' she knelt down and picked up the picture. There was glass on the floor, bit the picture as still undamaged. It was a picture of Tomoyo, Eriol, Sakura and Syaoran from about a year ago when they had all gone to England to visit Eriol.  
  
Sakura looked at it closely for the first time in her life. It was spring time, but Tomoyo's eyes were still watery as if she were cold. Sakura and Syaoran were hugging and kissing in the photo and Eriol stood next to Tomoyo with one of his sad smiles. They altogether made a cute photo, but the fact that Tomoyo was on the brink of tears made the photo seem. odd.  
  
Sakura sighed and put down the photo while she swept up the glass shards and placed them in the trash. She turned on the TV and began to watch the December dedications.  
  
And I Just wish that I didn't feel Like there was Something I missed And I Take back all the things I said to you  
  
Tomoyo sped her car over to the station.  
  
'You're going be late and she'll never know. No one will. And even if you make it, she'll be at the wedding by then so it won't matter.'  
  
Tomoyo ignored her thoughts of doubt. Syaoran ha promised to postpone the wedding so to make it fair for Sakura to decide. He turned off his cell phone and decided that being twenty minutes late was okay because "My tuxedo wasn't ready. Where's your maid of honor?"  
  
Tomoyo would've smiled at how witty Shyaoran had turned out to be, but she had no time to even consider the smiling possibility. It was now or never.  
  
She raced out of her car as she reached the parking lot and went up the elevator. She must've pressed the button a hundred times before it finally opened and she hit the button for the third floor where they did the December dedications. She stood in line and cut to the front, explaining her situation the best she could. The people seemed generous enough and she paid 5,000 yen to get on every screen in the city.  
  
It was show time.  
  
And I give it all away Just to have Somewhere to go to Give it all away To have someone To come home to  
  
Syaoran rushed into the room. "Sakura! Sakura!" he called as he shook the snow off his coat. He stumbled into the living room where she was sitting watching the December dedications. She looked up at him with curious eyes and flipped off the TV. "No!!" he cried out and flipped it back on.  
  
"Syaoran? What's this about?" she cried out incredulously. "We have to be at the wedding in fifteen minutes! Where's your clothes? Sh. Syaoran?" she looked at him as he closely as he put up his hand for quiet. He stared intently at the TV and she turned too.  
  
The man who was up finished and the announcer came on. "That was beautiful. Next we have a broadcast of a Tomoyo Daidouji to someone she says never even guessed."  
  
Tomoyo's picture filled the screen and she had a serious expression on her beautiful face. "My dedication tonight is to someone whom I never told I loved them and they're about to get married. They were the most beautiful person in the world to me, and they have been all my life. I told them so many times, and it hurt so much for that person to not realize what I really meant. And now, it's come to this. My last attempt to make you understand before it's too late. Sakura Kinomoto, I'm in love with you and always have been since the first time we met."  
  
The picture was gone off the screen and the announcer came on. Syaoran turned off the TV and turned to Sakura who had shock in her eyes.  
  
"We were supposed to get married in five minutes. Why did you show me that?"  
  
"You needed to know. You have to choose." He said simply.  
  
Sakura turned to him, eyes full of rage. "I needed to know right before our wedding?! What's wrong with you people?! Don't you understand that-that I really don't want to hear that right before I'm supposed to get married?!" She had grabbed the front of his shirt out of fury.  
  
"She's going to be waiting for you at Penguin Park."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Go." Sakura grabbed the keys and left.  
  
This is my December This is my time of the year This is my December This is all so clear  
  
Tomoyo sat in the swing. She stared straight ahead, yet at nothing at all. The voice had gone for now and she wondered if it had been telling the truth the whole time.  
  
A car drove up and the young woman, who's haunting beauty had exasperated Tomoyo after all these years, stepped out. In the cold snow, she still did not shiver. She walked straight over to Tomoyo and sat down next to her.  
  
"So. you're in love with me."  
  
Tomoyo showed no emotion. "That pretty much sums it up."  
  
"You know. that I'm. in love with him and not you, right?" Sakura said the last part quickly, feeling very uncomfortable at the time.  
  
Tomoyo nodded, remembering what the little voice had said. It was right.  
  
"Good. Now, if you'll excuse me" Sakura stood up and looked at her car which she had left running "I have to go get married. They're all waiting for the final 'I do's. So. will I see you there?" Sakura asked.  
  
Tomoyo shook her head. 'Actually I was thinking about moving to Europe. You see, I have my bags packed and I even have a ticket. Ain't that convenient?' was what she wanted to say, but all she could do was shake her head.  
  
Sakura nodded. "I understand."  
  
And Tomoyo placed a picture in her head into stone of Sakura walking away.  
  
And I give it all away Just to have somewhere To go to Give it all away To have someone To come home to 


End file.
